..........

i am standing in the middle of a room, quietly doing as i am supposed to and minding my surroundings......all i want to do is scream at the top of my lungs.  i am tired and finished.

hump day

i am just a little frustrated.  our roof is still not fixed.  it has bee a month, the materials have been sitting in my yard for almost 2 weeks, and it poured yesterday for hours.  we have sprung another leak in the bathroom.  i hate contractors.  this is why we do all of the work ourselves on this house.  if i could get up on the roof myself i would.  o.k. enough venting about my new "water front" property.

life is flying past me.  i can NOT believe it's almost halloween.  i have a show in 2 weeks and i have a quarter of the product made for it.  i have my huge show in a month, and i feel like i will never be ready.  i know i work well under pressure, but i am even having my doubts.  i am sure it will work out.  my mind is brimming over with so many ideas, that i have almost gone into stupid mode.  kind of like i am so overwhelmed that i can't start creating.  i just have to sit down and start making stuff.  the show in 2 weeks is the easier of the 2.  i think more gift like items for baby and Christmas presents, more $10 to $20 range, the one in Princeton, a little on the higher end.  i really hope i start to do well with this business venture.  work is starting to change for the worse and i am not happy there anymore.  i hate it with a passion and if the GM goes, i go.  i will not explain my life anymore to ignorant people.

it's time to step up my game, come up with a business plan and go for it.  design a web site, designate a blog spot to my designs and promote the hell out of myself.  stop floundering around and waiting for success to happen, but rather create success for myself.

it's about time

It has been ages since I have updated my blog.  I feel like life is passing me by and I am viewing it from the outside (or inside since I haven't left the house in forever).  We had such a long summer.  Emma had surgery in July to put a feeding tube in and to have a procedure done to "tighten" her stomach opening to stop reflux.  Do to complications with her surgery, she had to have it repeated.  She recovered beautifully from the surgeries and we were starting to get back into life.  We were able to go on a family vacation, Connor started second grade, (I still can NOT believe that one) and Emma went back to therapy.  Even the hubby seemed to be settling back into a routine with school.  The all of the sudden, Emma became gravely ill.  We thought she was not going to make it.  She had a blockage in her small intestine.  Scar tissue from her other surgery had lodged itself there.  She was septic.  I have never been so scared in my life.  The removed part of her intestine and by a miracle she is alive.  Feisty, and crazy with energy now, she is doing well.  I have about a thousand new grey hairs and I am 10 pounds lighter, but life is resuming.  (stress is the best diet.)

Now I am under pressure.  I cannot even start to begin to tell you how much I hate waiting tables.  I run my ass off for people for little in return.  I would rather be secluded in my craft space creating.  But I have to do what I have to do.  We are drowning in debt with all of the time I had to take off because of the baby's surgeries.  We just had to max out everything due to hurricane Ike, we need to put a new roof on, (I hope they come and install it soon.  I am tired of looking at the supplies in my front yard.)  I am preparing for a few upcoming shows.  I am excited I was able to get into a big show in the Princeton area.  Hopefully I will make some money from them so my kids can have a Christmas.  What a great time for a long lost relative or Oprah to show up at my door!  A hundred grand should do it for us.

Ah, the babe is calling.  I hope to post more often now that life is better.  I think a blog should be in the works for my business.  Oh, along with all of this drama over the summer and running my boutique, www.MissEmmasCloset.etsy.com and working like a crazy person, I split up my shop into 2 distinct stores.  My original shop (above) is now dedicated to baby designs and my new shop, www.TheFrenchBee.etsy.com shabby chic home designs.  Stop by for a while.  Both shops will donate 10% of the profits to Emma's hospital, St. Pete's in New Brunswick, NJ.

update.

I hate when so much time goes by without posting here.  I feel like a slacker, but life is just so busy sometimes.  Lets see, since I have posted last, a ton of things have transpired.  Emma had to go for about 2 weeks of testing the first and second weeks of July.  It was all pre-op testing, all involving her digestive track.  She had a GI tube (feeding tube) surgically put in her belly and another procedure to "tighten" the opening to her esophagus, to eliminate reflux.  On July 18, Emma had the surgeries, and they went beautifully and took less time than anticipated.  By Sunday night, I was able to move her around without much pain.  Unfortunately things took a sour turn, Monday July 21, Emma had to have the surgery repeated.  Complications came up and when the doc tried to pull the drainage tube out of her nose it was stuck.  Emma was brought back down to surgery and had the procedures repeated.  It was a freak thing that the drainage tube somehow got stuck in a stitch.  It just was an unfortunate crazy thing.  We then wound up spending 7 days in ICU, and another 4 or so days in the pediatric ward.  Gotta love the hospital though.  everyone is fabulous there and i can't say enough about them, although some of the residents need their little attitudes checked.  but as for now, Emma is doing really well.  We went for her post-op check up and she is cleared for the tub and the pool and even the ocean!  The feeding tube has been a god send and it seems she is responding well.  She is able to eat by mouth, but when she is sleeping or having a bad day, no matter what she is fed and hydrated properly.  I have even seen a decrease, fingers crossed, in the amount of spasms she is having and the seizures are less severe.  Hopefully this is a turning point in her health.  We are even trying out going on vacation in a couple of weeks.  

As for the business, I need everyone to come for a look around in the next few weeks.  I am starting to work on my fall line.  It is a huge departure from what is in my shop now.  Nothing new to me, I have been making blankets, fabric necklaces and home decor my whole life, But it will just give my boutique more diversity, (trust me anyone who has been to my house knows that everything in it was made by myself or altered in some way by me!:)).  I have so many projects that I am working on right now I can't wait to start listing them.  I will have a new posting daily starting the last week of august.  There are also plans for a home show in the fall, possibly in October for a holiday boutique open house.  If you are local and would be interested in coming to a home party hosted by yours truly, please by all means contact me, either via etsy www.missemmascloset.etsy.com or comment here.   I am also thinking of doing a craft fair at west Windsor High School.  We shall see though.  As they say, timing is everything.   

As for now, I am going to try to enjoy the next 2 weeks off with my kids and my hubby. I haven't even laid out once yet.  I look awfully pale for the end of the summer.  Before I know it, it will be time for my little man to start second grade!!!

epiphany

i had an epiphany last night.  i was watching oprah, and i caught a show i had seen before.  it was about the laws of attraction in the universe.  i came to the conclusion that positive people attract positive energies is truthful.  i have been wanting to make a positive change in my life for a long time now.  i feel like i am stuck in a rut and going no where, kind of like the mouse on the spinning wheel.  i didn't know what to do since i work hard and do what i am supposed to do in life.  but that is just it, i am just going along with what life is handing me instead of attracting what i really want.  it was a powerful epiphany, enlightening.  i do have to say that i woke up feeling lighter, like good things are going to happen, i will attract what i want.  i will have a successful business, happy kids, a happy husband, and a life i want to live not just living a life.

ahhhh, thursday

well, it's been quite some time since i last posted.  that pesky thing called life keeps getting in the way of what i would like to accomplish everyday.  i guess if no one winds up broken by the end of the day and everyone is fed and bathed it's a good day.  today is very busy for me.  emma had therapy at 8 A.M.  then i have to be at the pediatrician this afternoon.  the dentist told me emma needs to go to a cranial facial surgeon.  her suck is lagging, so they need to asses her, i want a second opinion.  wouldn't be the first time someone was wrong.  then i need to race over to the hospital for blood work for emma--lab core tried 3 times and couldn't get a vein, i'm over the torture.  then i have to boogy over to the eye dr. because connor and i both need new glasses.  i don't think i will be home until at least 9 tonight.  i am treating us to a dinner out for a change.  tomorrow i need to work on the business and chill in the house.  

as for Miss Emma's Closet, things are really looking good.  i just filled a custom order for favors for a communion, i have another custom order that needs to be finished this week, and one of the classes at jason's school has "ordered" 17 floral boxes for their mother's day presents.  i am also going to be featuring some items in a boutique show the first 2 weekends in may.  (that gig is pretty good.  little higher end.    not to mention the wedding i have to make things for this august for jason's co-teacher.  so things are looking up.  unfortunately i am at the point where i sink all of the money i make back into supplies.  hopefully with in the next 6 months i will turn a profit.  i have enough in supplies to last me for a while unless i need to make something custom.  a little bit of progress.  someone has also contacted me in regards to being in a magazine article about customizing your wedding.  that's pretty cool.  i was in utter shock over that one.  especially since it was out of the blue.  we'll see about that one though, they haven't gotten back to me yet.

busy, busy and more busy.  it's getting harder to balance work, wife, mother, business owner and friends.  i wish there were 28 hours in a day or that i only required 4 hours of sleep!  LOL!  it would make for a much smoother ride!

My dream is coming true!

my new business is up and running.  it is not officially launching until april 1.  but i did put several things up there to work on my profile and what not.  i looked at my store today around 1 or so.  instead of 8 things on there there were 7!  i actually sold one of my decorative boxes today!  so it's official.  once you sell something you are a business.  oh, and i feel awesome!  i got my business cards yesterday too!   it really may happen.